magic- intention plus visualization, with full sensory perception incorporated. Sight, sound, scent, taste, touch, intuition. Live with purpose. We are not helpless victims. We make it happen.

17 seconds of pure thought connects us to another thought ‘like’ it. “Like attracts like.” 68 seconds of thought put us on the vibrational frequency of that which we think about. Set your intentions and focus on your affirming desires, not negating complaints. This way we can attract good fortune, health, love.. It will fall into our hands in the process. Thoughts are things.


"So sorry madam, your lab results return normal. May I suggest and anti-depressant?" This is wrong. We are not glutenous hypochondriacs. Learn how to read your own symptoms.

A fitness journey- One in ten women have a form of insulin resistance called PCOS (polycystic ovarian syndrome). Is it even possible to be fit? I am starting to find an exit out of choas. Will I make it?

Polycystic ovarian syndrom (PCOS) involves- insulin resistance, infertility, facial hair, male pattern balding, acne, anxiety, depression, adrenal burnout from years of undetected hypoglycemia, unexplained weight gain, especially around the girth, so you look perpetually pregnant. You feel like quasi motto it is so deforming. This kind of belly fat is especially dangerous because it can lead to diabetes, heart disease, breast cancer, auto-immune arthritis, and any inflammatory disease.

This is because insulin resistance promotes testosterone, leading to estrogen dominance, creating more insulin resistance, and so a vicious cycle. Standard treatment includes an anti-androgen like Spironolactone and Metformin for blood sugar. There is no cure, but the symptoms can be managed or possibly eliminated. PCOS can be a gift if we head the warning. It has taken me a long time to accept that even one slice of sprouted whole grain bread has the glucose load equivalent to a mars bar for me. Sugar is hiding every where. Grass is sugar. That is why cows are fat. 'The Zone' would make a good life style choice for maintenance. But I have not found a way to lose the "baby fat" on even a 'low-glycemic' menu. I am running out of options. But I still have one ..I have already lost 20 lbs on the 'low-carb' curry chicken diet. lol. Everyone should behave like a diabetic.

PCOS is diagnosed mentally first. It can be caused by insulin resistance, which is caused by cortisol stress, caused by adrenal insufficiency, caused by years of hypoglycemia, caused by a hungry childhood, caused by an isolated burned-out mom who didn't know wazzup with her body, because our religious right to help in the kitchen was trifled with, and so her education and support. That is probably the strongest opinion you will ever hear from me. Decriminalize hen houses!

Moving on, I would like to talk about how I am coming along on my new fitness plan to treat these nasty symptoms.


this is one of the best videos I have ever seen


guide to friendship troubles- If you can learn to take care of yourself– to stick up for yourself in relationships– you’ll have learned one of lifes most important lessons. Nobody can stomp on you unless you let them.
1. can we talk? hear me out.
2. Remember the other day?
3. Well, It’s been bothering me.
4. I was really hurt by . . .
5. How do you see what happened? – What did you mean by that?
6. Maybe we have to agree to disagree on that
7. Our friendship means a lot to me, and I want to work this out?
8. Remedy – I would feel better if . . .
9. Have I hurt you?
10. I am sorry
11. you can be open and direct with me, Do you respect me too? Do you want to be ordinary friends or more? *pick good time and place *plan what to say.  *stick to feelings not shortcomings *listen, listen, listen *time
true friend test- are they open minded and respect you? If not move on. no time *when together I feel good about myself *we share eachothers feelings *she listens *comfortable silence *give and take *she brings out the best in me *we never run out of things to talk about *she won’t cut me down *she stands up for me


I am thankful for celine dion, oprah, obama, black-eyed peas, t.p., plumbing, print on demand tech, canon 40d, moy, my babies, blue-blood ancestors, baseball, hot dogs, apple pie, and chevrolet, web 2.0, youtube, father abraham, pie esu, joseph smith, temples, the written word, grannies quilts, chiecko okasaki, dr. rray, the tree of life, mail..

kungfu panda

"Po, we do not wash our pits in the pool of sacred tears."


hamburger helper or filet mignon
van or sedan
yellowstone or disney
mcdonalds or olive garden
board games or video games
snow bunnies or
water babies
early birds or
night owls
road trip or air travel
white or
on the team or in the bleachers

40 Things Rarely Asked
1. Have you ever been searched by the cops?
2. Do you close your eyes on roller coasters? halfway
6. Do you consider yourself creative? yes, writing, cooking

13. What are you allergic to? cats

24. Do you always wear your seat belt?
25. What cell service do you use?
26. Do you like sushi? yes

28. What do you wear to bed? holey underware

31. Do you truly hate anyone?
not people but behavior.
32. Bluegrass or Rap?
35. What food do you find disgusting?
36. Windows or Macintosh?
39. Have you ever stood up for someone you hardly knew?
40. Have you ever sung in front of the mirror? yes

celine dion

one hour

I would spend that hour with my great great grandmother, Mary K. Roberts, a pioneer child when she crossed the plains on foot. A colonizer as a young mother, she actually loved to be out on the trail because she could get out of cooking, doing dishes, and her children pretty much entertained themselves. She liked to wonder off by herself, sit in silence by a babbling brook and imagine that someone knew her thoughts. She kept a faithful diary in which she expressed her love and anxiety for her children and future generations. We would sit in silence for a while. Then I would listen, ask many questions and continue to record her story. Then I would talk and get the detailed feedback and validation I've been craving these past years. I would secure my identity with Mary K.

mothers day 2007

It made me happy to get this handmade mothers day card from my daughter today after church. The feed back was affirming and encouraging.

mothers love

M y special friend
Owl watching carefully
Telling me to be glad
Hoping to be happy
Embeded in my life
Rising like a cloud
S ing me to sleep

L istening to my stories
Oli, Kudos and my mom
Very precious to me

"I don't want to drive up to the pearly gates in a shiny sports car, wearing beautifully tailored clothes, my hair expertly coiffed, and with long, perfectly manicured fingernails. I want to drive up in a mini van that has mud on the wheels from taking kids to scout camp. I want to be there with grass stains on my shoes from mowing my elderly neighbors lawn. i want to be there with a smudge of peanut butter on my shirt from making sandwiches for a sick neighbor's children. I want to be there with a little dirt under my fingernails from helping to weed someones garden. I want to be there with children's sticky kisses on my cheeks and the tears of a friend on my shoulder. I want the Lord to know I was really here and that I really lived." ~Marjorie P. Hinkley

women & authority

I was watching the movie 'Take the Lead' with Antonio Banderous about Latin Dance and the nature of leading and following. It makes me think of women and the priesthood. I like how the Spanish accentuate feminine and masculine and how it compliments each other. The instructor, Antonio, explained that in dance the woman follows, not like a wet noodle. Their is just enough resistance in dance so that you have a sense of each other and can become one on the dance floor. You council, collaberate and share accountability without blame. The man or leader, does not make demands but a simple request, an invitation. He asks her to join him on a journey, "Let's take a walk". "Come follow me". It is in the woman's power to *choose* by following. And we can choose *this day* whom we serve, what our focus and priorities are.
Women are born with the natural burden of the moral nurturing of society. Men are *called* to be accountable and help relieve women of the sole responsibility. I like that. Women are born natural empathizers and fail to be heard unless men are called upon to shut up and listen.
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June said: Truly excellent observation. In my humble opinion, sometimes to get our men's attention we have to use a very LARGE stick....a 2x4 works well! Please note: this is no defeciency of said female, just an unobservent male (no offense guys!) AFTER the "attention-getting" treatment, explain what you want, require, or need in short sentences...It helps!
* * *
June, that is exactly what I have been looking for. Real and concise council for posterity: "Short sentences and a 2x4, after the attention getting treatment." Might work in bed too. Guess we have to take the bull by the horns. We'll have to redefine romance. I wish we had a role model.

log cabin

My ideal home would be 1. A log cabin (12” logs) with picture windows and a view. I like the sound of rain on a tin roof. 2. I like the open concept ‘great room’ with high ceiling, where the kitchen, dining room, and family room with a fire place are all open to eachother. This way I can enjoy cooking without being isolated in my commercial kitchen with island. I don’t like too many walls and feeling boxed in. 3. I’d need a full basement. 4. The laundry room, sewing room, linen and bathroom all in one large unit. 5. Storage for kitchen, office supply, e-bay warehousing 6. A Library, music room, confrence room in one unit. A gymn/ play room, game room, pool table, large quilting center and T.V. room in one unit. 7. Husbands Den 8. Study room/ Scrappbooking center 9. Grandparents room/ Guest Room 10. Master Bedroom with pole 11. Boy’s Bedroom 12. Girls Bedroom 13. Fenced Yard with Outbuildings (long garage/ barn, Swing set – tree house, fort, yurt, T.P., Pool/ Jacuzzi, Grandparents/ Guest house – music studio) 14. The option of adding an additional room every 15 years for each new memeber of the harem. A house should serve women, not the other way around. I want time for myself to dance, read and write.

he lives!

He is our advocate with the Father, the way, the truth and the life. He is my focus, my purpose, and legacy. I know that my Redeemer lives.

* * *

come thou fount
* * *

My relationship with heavenly father. He's smiling.


This picture reminds me of the sunrise route I took to early morning seminary while attending the Carson Valley High School. From the Genoa road you could see the whole Carson Valley like a patchwork quilt of farm land, the straight ribbon of highway running through, the fantastic sunrise! As a young women I knew the meaning of life, I felt so alive and such gratitude. This is also the breathtaking view from our home atop a crest of hill just below the Sierra Mountains Job's Peak. Green valley and snow capped mountains. For a 'poor' man dad provided us some good living (Tahoe pines and mountain lake, the Palouse rolling green hills, blooming desert oasis that my mom created, Colorado Rockies, the Eifles of Germany, California coast, great road trips) This was practicly the scene from our home above Carson Valley only a little more southernly.